The Urge to Purge

 There are periods during the spiritual process of self-dissolution when the urge to purge the negative emotional energies is overwhelming. This is often prevalent in the period leading up to the initial spiritual awakening, and later phases as the perception reaches deeper into the higher realms of mind. What happens during these intensified times is that the matter within the body (which formulates the psychic structure of self) begins to quicken in vibration with the rate of transmission being released from reality. The mind translates this frequency of enhanced power as an urge to purge the inner space of any residual force which may inhibit the flow of pure psyche now being registered within.

Often during these times, the person can struggle to hold things together and their actions can appear strange to others. When the spirit first entered my own psyche over thirty years ago the urge to purge the body of its impurities was so intense. Overnight I abstained from whatever I evaluated could be detrimental to the purification process. The sudden cutting off from smoking, drinking alcohol, and switching to a more wholesome diet caused my psycho/spiritual system to go into overdrive. I began to have major withdrawal symptoms manifesting as vivid hallucinations and eccentric behaviour. There was a popular song being played at the time which had a deep meaning for me: ‘The King of Pain’ by the band The Police. I’m not sure what the writer, Sting, was conveying with the words but to me it was about transcending the pain of the past and mastering the self.

As the life is lived and the individual adjusts to the changes within the body consciousness the spiritual process becomes a way of life. The urge to purge is then integrated in a way that is usually able to be contained while participating in the everyday affairs of the world. What before would have necessitated periods of withdrawal from others during periods of inner change can now be handled with a greater resolve and forbearance. The surrender of self to the great magnet of the void becomes less an action of force but an offering of pure love which magnifies the purification of self. This is why the death of the falsity of self is often cited as being beautiful in its awful intensity of transformation. The agony becomes the ecstasy. And ultimately both sides of existence merge as the still point – life purged of the impurities of self.