The I of the Beholder

July 14, 2023 1 By Lance Kelly


At the eternal moment, which science refers to as the ‘big bang’, the universal ‘I’ emerged as the first condition of intelligence – but the instant after the original moment the idea of existence was conceived. Within this infinitesimal gap between I arising and the appearance of everything that could ever exist, does all subsequent existence arise in time. Thus did the evolutionary cycle of I begin towards the rectification of its missing knowledge, preserved within the gap of ‘lost time.’ This is why, when awaking from sleep each morning, the subconscious impulse is to fill in the time sensed to be ‘lost’ through being temporarily absent from the world.

Without I there is no world or universe to reflect upon and we’d be unable to function in existence as self-conscious beings. This can be observed in the newborn baby. Although intelligence is present, regulating the bodily functions and keeping the life form instinctively alert, there’s no self-reflective I at this early stage to recognise ‘I exist’. I emerge with experience and a memory and, with it, all the troubles of the world. What happens is that the purely instinctual I is degraded through the gathering of emotion as the personal self. The nature of self becomes vehemently opposed to the one good, creating multiple versions of I as the personality to eventually lose contact altogether with the innocence of the instinctual I.

I am the one and only appearing as the many. As there’s only the one I, so there’s only the one life, which is the vital sense of being alive. In truth I am the only life on earth since everything else is a form of life. Feeling exists only in the individual man or woman in the body reading these words. When I’m in touch with the harmony and wellbeing within the body, there’s peace on earth despite the appearance of things. Whenever emotional negativity arises I’m in conflict with the world, which then must appear as the problematical circumstances in my life. As I am within, so must my world mirror my inner state – a universal truth that has been uttered since the earliest of times.

Down through the ages, prophets and mystics have acknowledged God as I by such sayings as: ‘You shall have no other God but I’, or ‘I shall never leave thee nor forsake thee.’ Through the gradations of the system of reality, the one universal I utilises the structure of the psyche to be instinctually present in billions of life forms, including all the species, as aspects of itself. This was the primary purpose of life on earth – to establish I as creative intelligence to enjoy in sense the beauty and wonder of sensual existence. Through the virtue of Man, the principle of terrestrial intelligence, human beings were awarded sovereignty of the earth and imbued with a unique self-reflective consciousness. This enabled I to be realised in existence as the conscious presence of the spiritual reality behind the appearance of the world.

I, the beholder, am God in every body; this is the ultimate truth. However, the temptation to objectify the formless truth I am is almost overwhelming; but not when realised in an individual’s own living experience. It’s reported that Jesus Christ said ‘I am the way, the truth and the life’. Two thousand years ago the consciousness of the times was unable to receive the simplicity of the truth. Consequently, and for generations that followed, everyone assumed that Jesus the man was referring to himself as God instead of the universal I within every man and woman on earth. And religious belief persists today as the main impediment to the direct experience of reality. Even atheism (which is still an intellectual concept) is a barrier to being responsible for I, the pure intelligence behind the form.

But today, with thousands of years of self-projection externalised as the materialism of the world, I am rarely heard – and even more rarely realised amidst the clatter and momentum of the modern global culture. And yet it changes nothing in relation to the grand scheme of the divine creative integrity. Everybody’s destiny is to unite with I as their eternal being whence all things originate. Without the mirrored reflection of particular forms of life, I am unknowable in knowing all within the dream of existence. The dream is the release of my timeless essence apportioned to individual lives in varying degrees of potency. I in every body am God; but the degree of self-knowledge determines how conscious I am of my own reality.